The weight came on at about one pound per month. I really didn’t notice it at first, but eventually my work clothes got tighter and tighter and I knew I needed to buy some new pants. Tops were easy, but pants are tough to find even for fit women. For a woman in denial about her real weight, it’s excruciating. So, when I found a pair that fit, I bought it in three colors. It turned out that the black pair was a slightly different style and actually a bit looser than the other two. They became a staple in my wardrobe.
The pants served me well for the last 5 or 6 years. I called the black pair into service twice a week…sometimes three times if I needed to wear business casual on the weekend. Now they are well worn, and tattered at the cuffs. About 4 years ago, I lost 25 pounds and bought two new pairs of black pants…but I promptly gained five back when I went on vacation and the pants never fit. Eventually the other 20 pounds returned and I was back to my fat-girl pants once again.
When the cuffs first started to fray, I took to snipping off the frayed ends with a pair of sharp scissors. This worked fine, but I knew that they couldn’t last forever. More recently, I’d noticed they were getting a bit shiny in places and even though they’ve worn like iron and stood up to two or three times through the washer and dryer every week for years, they were on their last legs (so to speak!).
As I’ve lost weight over the last ten weeks, I would look longingly at the two pairs of unworn black pants in my closet. After about a month, I tried them on. I was encouraged that I could get them past my thighs and hips, but I couldn’t button them. After two months, I could button them, but they were still too tight. Finally, a week ago, they fit and they fit me well. That is when I declared that I’d dropped a dress size.
Last night, I took this picture of the waistbands of the fat-girl pants and the new pants. Then I promptly tossed the fat-girl pants into the trash. The fat-girl pants stood me in good stead and got me through countless days of work when it seemed impossible to find time for exercise or enough energy to cut back on my calories. Those are the old days and this thinner woman needs no reminders of her fat days and no enticements to re-gain the weight.
Someday soon, I will have the energy and desire to clear out my closet and get rid of anything too big, too out of style, too worn, or too ugly. I’m sure I’ll discover some treasures that fit and some that will fit soon, great encouragement to keep on going with my weight-loss plan.
Just throwing out that one pair of pants makes me realize that I am never going back to my fat-girl days. I’m enjoying the energy I get from exercise. I am stronger and can run for longer than at any time in my life, even as a teen. The weight is coming off slowly, steadily, and consistently. That is fine with me! After all, I need a chance to wear my new pants before they themselves become my fat-girl pants!
Find the Joy in the Journey…focus on the next step, but keep your eye on the horizon!
Laura's Adventures After 50! 